While living in the Washington DC area, I was required to learn how to maneuver traffic circles. These ingenious traffic solutions keep vehicles moving, unlike intersections with traffic lights, which force everyone to stop and wait until the light turns green again. While traffic circles cut down one’s commute time considerably, they do require close attention paid to where you are and which exit you need to take. Otherwise, you can find yourself either taking the wrong turn or driving around the circle, over and over again.
This traffic circle, along the George Washington Parkway, is one that multitudes of commuters use to access the Pentagon or the city for work or school. Taken from high above Arlington Cemetery, this photo shows the spectacular view of the Arlington Bridge crossing the Potomac River, ending at the Lincoln Memorial. From here it is easy to see where one should exit the traffic circle in order to get to the desired destination. But at ground level, it can be extremely confusing, paralyzing even. There were many occasions after first moving to the DC area that I kept going around the circle, afraid of taking the wrong exit. What does this iconic traffic circle have to do with the practice of lamenting? Plenty! Often as we move through the movements of lament, we get stuck in the traffic circle of complaint. We are paralyzed by our pain, loneliness, and fear that God is good and can be trusted, even in the midst of our suffering. Yet with each rotation we make around that traffic circle, the more susceptible we are to our complaints turning to grumbling.
We’ve all experienced seasons of loss in which we find ourselves crying, “Why me?” “How much longer, Oh Lord?” “I believe you are good, but this isn’t good!” Perhaps we feel guilty even admitting to thinking or saying these things. Philippians 2:14 seems clear, “Do everything without grumbling or arguing,” and most Bible translations substitute “complaining” for “grumbling.” Is there a difference? I believe so. The difference is where our cries lead us.
Lament can help us to articulate our loneliness and despair in times of grief, but it also keeps us closely connected to the truths of God’s character and His word. Grumbling is when our grief and anguish disconnects us from God and His promises. In the long dark nights of suffering, comfort and ease can quietly become idols that we look to for hope. We don’t want to exit the traffic circle and instead drive around and around, rehearsing and nursing our hurts. Our discontent, even anger at God for all the hardships we are encountering can form calluses on our heart, resulting in a deep dissatisfaction in God and His purposes. But that is not lament, that is grumbling.
Yes, the lament says, “Confess your anguish. Confess your pain. Lay it out bare!” However, lament then directs us to turn our eyes upon Christ, the many comforts promised to us through the Holy Spirit, and we exit the traffic circle heading towards the provision and contentment that only comes in Christ!
Blessings,
Gay B Brown
I like your analogy of broken lament, that is, getting stuck in paralyzing “traffic circles” of grumbling and self-pity.